I've been wanting to write this blog for quite a while yet have felt a certain hesitancy in putting this out there. Not sure why but here it goes...
On September 1, 2009 I found out I was pregnant. I was at work and decided to take a test because that's what you do each and every month when you are trying. :-) This time I seriously could not believe my eyes...two lines appeared within seconds and I new in my heart that God was at work....
You see Adam and I had decided to take a break the month of August. After our 3rd IUI was unsuccessful we both were certain that taking a break was just what we needed. The emotional roller coaster and the disappointment gets exhausting after a while and we needed to take time off from the doctor appointments, shots, remembering what day it was, etc.... For those of you in this journey you know what I'm talking about!! During this month God worked in our hearts in ways that are pretty indescribable. If you recall from a previous post, August was also the month we were given an opportunity to adopt and through God's infinite wisdom he showed us that wasn't His plan for us. A miracle was in the making....
I called Adam at work and I think I said "There are two lines!!" He was a bit confused since I didn't give him many details and I just screamed "I'm pregnant." He too was completely shocked and responded with "What do I need to do." ...just keep working!! :-) When he got home he was able to see for himself what we both had come not to expect...
The true beauty of the timing of all of this is that it was unexpected!! In our process God gave me a verse that I've treasured in my heart. Luke 1:45 says "blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished." In my heart of hearts I knew that one day Adam and I would have children. I didn't know how or when but I knew God was at work and I fought every day to believe, to hope.
My heart continues to break for my friends who continue to struggle with infertility. Many nights I find myself in tears over the losses and disappointments of my dear friends and even some that I don't know that well. If you are reading this and you're the one who's heart is breaking because your still waiting...I get it and I'm so sorry. I know what it's like to be so happy for life given to others yet so sad at the same time. Keep fighting to believe, keeping hoping...and when you can't anymore I pray God gifts you with a community that will fight with you and for you! And if I can pray for you please let me know as I'd count it an honor to walk with you.
So our due date is May 11th and we would appreciate your prayers. We feel so blessed to have such an incredible family and a community of people that have loved us and supported us in so many ways. We are so grateful.
